veryghostlythoughts:

Today while at work a guy came in and brought 10 dozen eggs. After I gave him his change and the last bag of eggs he looked at me with the most serious expression ever and said “eggcellent” before walking away and I swear in that moment I had never been happier to sell a man eggs

(via sassyturnip)

ishipitlikeups:

dantheinsane1:

ishipitlikeups:

Nobody asked me to prom, so I took my calculator.

Pics or it didn’t happen

His name is T.I.

He brought me flowers.

Obligatory outdoor photos.

Here I am, introducing him to friends.

A close-up shot of his dashing visage.

My principal talked about it in his weekly email, but he got it wrong. That tux was some damn fine imported silk.

(via pleatedjeans)

(via sassyturnip)

catswithbenefits:

why is everyone is making fun of amanda bynes!? how would you feel if your mom was stranded in a hot air balloon??

(via swagblogger2k11)

pleatedjeans:

Looks like Walmart raised its low prices. via

(via twerknugget)

unfollower:

timoodles:

there is a town called sandwich in massachusetts

there are literally police cars labelled sandwich police

i live in Cumming don’t talk to me

(via thesuitelifeofprozacandcody)

sluttyoliveoil:

the biggest mystery in my life is the story behind this picture

(via swagblogger2k11)

(via swagblogger2k11)

bettythetl:

mr-radical:

SOON.

(via twerknugget)